"Disappear"

Disappear

Beyoncé-I Am…

Tonight I took a walk. I glanced out the window of my favorite Starbucks and simply could not stop myself. I slowly gathered my belongings together, softly neglecting my Chinese homework until a later day, and I said my goodbyes.

I knew that, if you had not already been engaged somewhere else, you would have walked with me. You hate the cold, but I knew that you would have carefully slipped your fingers into mine, coming with every step closer to loving the snow as much as I do. It was cold, this is true, but what would it matter when you were with me? You would have smiled at me gently and cherished every block.

I knew as I felt each fit of flurries caress my cheek that you were thinking of me too. I cannot say how, but I just felt it. I could not remember where you said you would be, but I knew that you were somewhere in the snow, imagining that we were together. Every step took me further or closer to you, but it didn’t really matter. I knew you were thinking of me, and that was enough.

I knew when I danced my way across Canal Street that you would have danced with me too. You would have been slightly reluctant at first, but I would have coerced you out of it. You would have broken into that bright smile that makes my heart float, and you would have danced my favorite jig. We would have reached the other side and stopped with a soft, snowy kiss. Or maybe not. Maybe we would have boogied the whole way home. We both come from very spontaneous breeds.

I knew that we would come home together and crawled into bed. There would be no need to shower; the snow had washed us clean, and it would be a gentle night. We both had spent so many nights before alone, and now the warmth is all we need. I knew before I met you that one day I would find you, find your warmth, and that is why I waited.

I know that tonight you thought of me. I know because, as I contentedly walked myself through the snow, I thought of you. I returned home and softly shook the remnants of winter out of my hair, calmly watching as the flakes floated down to my feet. I undressed, showered, redressed, and I crawled into bed.

Here I am.

Here I lie.

Here I wait.

I know that someday, somewhere, I will meet you. Someday, somewhere, it will snow. And someday, somewhere, we will take a walk.

[Disappear]